I know a lot of fellow authors who blog almost daily, and I truly do envy them. They are so good at sharing their funny anecdotes about life. I, unfortunately, suck at blogging. I’ve tried several times, but I find I’m much better at writing stories about fictional characters. My problem is that when I blog, I get too far into my own head. It’s a messy place that no one really wants to go. I think my biggest issue is that I am my own worst enemy. I try to be uplifting, but I generally fail at it. I would consider myself someone with a good sense of humor, but just because you can laugh at life and things other people say doesn’t mean you feel it in your bones.
I recently went to my thirty-year class reunion. Yeah, I’m dating myself big time, but I’ve never really kept my age a secret. Anyway, one of my old drinking buddies was there and I sat with him and his wife at the dinner. I thought we had a great time. I laughed, I told funny stories, they laughed. Sounds perfect, right? Well, my friend is now a high school teacher who works with my youngest sister. After the reunion, he mentioned to her that he’d spent some time with me the previous week. He told my sister how alike the two of us were. Duh. We’re so much alike that it’s kind of scary. Anyway, this friend said that one of the reasons we’re so similar is that we both are witty and fun but we always seem to carry an underlying anger with us. Hmmm, that made me really stop and think. My sister was pissed at the remark, but I couldn’t be because I know he’s right.
I think some people are good at getting rid of pain and other just learn to bury it. I am the kind of person who sucks it up and keeps going. I don’t really give myself the chance to deal with the things that have and still hurt me. I’m too busy to dwell on what went wrong, and, instead, I tend to bury it deep and move to the next item on my list. The problem with this scenario is that when I finally get a breather from all the stuff on my plate, it gives that pain time to float to the surface, so that my down time becomes less desirable. It’s probably the reason I continue to push myself to work hard because I know in work, I can forget. In writing, I can let a little of my pain out. I never go whole hog and get crazy with a story, but I can guarantee that for every tear you shed while reading one of my sadder books, I’ve shed a hundred. I guess it’s just the way I’m made.
While writing The Brick Yard, I was a complete mess most days. So much so that when I finished the book, I felt rather numb for nearly a month. It was a good experience for me, cathartic, in a way. I can’t lie and say I solved any of my own issues, but sometimes it helps to shine a little bit of light on the pain that I keep under lock and key.
I hope you will enjoy The Brick Yard, and I hope everyone out there who buries their pain, can find a way to shine a little light on it from time to time.
Blurb for The Brick Yard, the debut novel in Totally Bound’s What’s his Passion? imprint:
For Lucky Gunn, the hardest fight of his life happens outside the cage.
On the south side of Chicago sits an old gym called The Brick Yard.
Ten years ago, on a bitterly cold day, Lucky Gunn wandered into The Brick Yard dressed in a threadbare jacket, looking for refuge. He hadn’t expected the owner, Tony Brick, to welcome him with a job and a place to sleep when Lucky’s abusive and drug addicted mother made it too dangerous to return home.
Dray was a gay man living in a world of straight fighters. When his secret was exposed to the media, he dropped out, giving Lucky a piece of advice, if you want to make it as a MMA fighter, bury the part of yourself that won’t be accepted.
Lucky discovered the cage was the perfect place to keep his demons at bay, but when he learns his trainer and mentor, Brick, is suffering from end-stage cancer, he begins to spiral out of control. After eight years, Dray returns to help Lucky and Brick deal with the devastating news.
With Dray so close, Lucky’s old desires return, and Dray teaches him more than how to fight. Torn between his career and the passion he feels for Dray, Lucky finds that his past demons resurface in full force, threatening his sanity and his budding relationship with Dray.
Despite leaving the cage years earlier, Dray finds himself in the battle of his life with the only man he’s ever loved. Will he stand and fight or walk away like he did years earlier?
Buy it here: The Brick Yard
*****
Author Bio for Carol Lynne:
An avid reader for years, one day Carol Lynne decided to write her own brand of erotic romance. Carol juggles between being a full-time mother and a full-time writer. These days, you can usually find Carol either cleaning jelly out of the carpet or nestled in her favourite chair writing steamy love scenes.
*****
GIVEAWAY!
Enter Totally Bound’s competition for a chance to win The Brick Yard and two other titles from her backlist!
I love The Brick Yard. It is not a normal Carol Lynne book. Don’t get me wrong, I am a huge fan. This book however is something special.
The Brick Yard is a book that take you into the world of cage mixed martial arts and helps you understand why someone would not only participate in this sport, but become passionate about it.
I really fell in deep love with the three main characters. They are well written and fleshed out.
Needless to say, don’t enter me in the contest, I already bought the book. Good luck everyone.
i think you are a very talented writer whether your blogging or writing a book. I will read anything that you write because I know it’s going to be amazing.